Who am I?

I am me.
I am daughter, sister, friend
Becoming girlfriend, partner
Then aunt then wife then mother

Mother again, twice the person I once was
Aunt many more times
Friend and colleague
I become an Ex wife
Just another part of me

Am I now mother and father?
Still daughter, sister, friend
Aunt and mother

Somethings don’t change
We are still who we are
I am who I am
I am me.



© foxxx 2007

Past Present Future

The here and now is broken
The present fractured, held together with threads of complacency
Strands of fear.
A weakened heart prevents changes.

Visions of a past came through
Memories made real
But the past is only a shadow in those memories
Reality proved that the future is not dictated;
Events are created by brave hearts
And determined minds.

The shadows of a past have a cast light
And proved that the future is not always as expected.
Some present times are more real than the memories
That created them.

The envisioned future is changed
Hearts are shattered
Expectations now mere memories of what was once a future

A new future is ahead, unknown and unsure
Maybe to be broken but on present terms
Not with the past and with a brave heart.

Memories will always live with us
Always be remembered
Never as big and shiny as the here and now.

The good times are how we live
How we feel and how we reach forward
Whatever pain and cost creates the future
It is on the present terms, not the past.

Love vs Hate. It’s a close thing sometimes.

I love being on my own because:
I get to go to the supermarket and choose all the foods we love myself.
I get to choose all the plants that go in the garden.
I can sit on the sofa and watch TV or sit in silence. I choose.
I get to make all the decisions. I have no one to answer to.
I’m in charge all the time.
When there’s time to waste, I get to decide what to do.
I get the whole bed to myself, most often.
I can wake up when I’m ready, stretch and lay quietly listening to the world wake, alone.
I get to choose my life and there’s no one to question me.

I hate being on my own because:
I have to go to the supermarket and choose all the foods we love myself.
I have to choose all the plants that go in the garden.
I can sit on the sofa and watch TV or sit in silence, but there’s no conversation, no compromise.
I have to make all the decisions.
I have no one to answer to.
I’m in charge, all the time.
When there’s time to waste, I have to decide what to do.
I have the whole bed to myself most often.
I have to wake up when I’m ready, stretch and lay quietly listening to the world wake, alone.
I get to choose my life and there’s no one to question me.